5 Reasons Why Your Guest Post Pitch Is Failing [Witty Version]

Will you wear my letter jacket?

Getting someone else to host your content on their website or blog as a guest post is a lot like getting a girl to go steady with you, and then prove it by sporting your letter jacket as proof of your relationship. Just like having a hot girl strut through the high school halls sporting your colors can make you a very popular fellow, getting your post on the front page of popular sites can do the same. But just as having a fast ride and a smooth game can get you the cheerleader of your dreams, having the right benefits and the ability to convey them properly to website owners can get you the content placement you need to take your own project to the next level. There are only a few reasons girls give for refusing prospective beaus, and they ring almost identical to the accounts of webmasters telling why they turn down the opportunity of content space to inquiring guest posters.

why your guest post pitch fails

There are 5 top reasons why Website owners tell Jack to “hit the road”.

1. You’re A Lazy Bum.

If you are just looking for a place to plaster your links and self promote, then you can take that stuff elsewhere. There is a reason Google slapped the heck out of all of those spammy content farms and article directories in the past, and bloggers who value their rankings have no interest in getting with you if their big brother is going to rough them up like Ike Turner did Tina because your a bum. Contributing a guest post is not the same as the bum marketing strategies that got so many of those that hosted lazy marketers in trouble, and responsible webmasters make sure bums never have a chance.

guest post pitch

2. You’re In The Wrong Clique

Are you trying to get back links from other sources based mainly on their PR rank or because they contain a sought after keyword? Just because a girl is popular or fits your fetish doesn’t mean she’s the right one. Successful JVs take the right match. Make sure you look for niche relevant partners. Also look for sites that would look natural showcasing you writing style.

3. You’re Not Popular And Your An Idiot

Ok, so sometimes it is all about the popularity and not going to prom with the guy given the greatest improvement in special ed award. Great relationships aren’t based solely on what you get out of it, and you shouldn’t really expect your partner get excited if everyone hates you, or even worse, no one even knows who you are. You should both be able to share your social circle and intelligent conversation. If you do not have the ability to provide either, there’s not much in it for the other person. If you can not provide extra traffic from your own following or known expertise that will improve a bloggers site content, then be prepared to get shot down every time.

4. You’re Awkward or Shy

Sometimes good guys just don’t have a chance because they do not know what to say. Girls like a man with confidence and the ability to convey it. Likewise, you should be able to propose the benefits you offer convincingly, or just like that lonely shy kid, you might have to just keep that image in your mind, and um, well you know.

5. Your A Sleazeball with No Tact

Some girls like the bad boy act, but telling all the girls in the hall that Viagra, a cigarette, and a good time awaits them in the locker room rarely works to your benefit. That only works with easy girls who don’t commit. If you use blackhat methods to contact blog owners you will ruin your chances of finding quality hosts and quickly become known as a bottom feeder to be avoided.

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